Graphic Mummy

Ah! Pinterest and Instagram… The idyllic imagery of how life should be – walks in the countryside with your children, dressed perfectly for the occasion, before heading back to your immaculate home for some wholesome arts and crafts, and a nutritious meal made from organic artisan mung beans and wilted spinach… All of this fits nicely in between work, nap times (sadly not your own) school runs, feeding your offspring and trying to maintain some sense of order in your house.

NO.

It’s total horse crap and don’t let anyone try to tell you otherwise. I certainly won’t.

Don’t get me wrong, obviously, I love my children dearly – fiercely in fact. But I (and probably every other parent) scrape through my days juggling more things than I ever thought possible, and sometimes the only way to survive is a little catharsis in the form of soothingly uttering the words ‘Shhh, don’t be a dick…’ in your toddler’s ear.

They should send in the jaded to teach Sex Ed.

We hear it all the time: ‘It only seems like yesterday…’ No, it doesn’t. I spawned my son nearly 11 years ago, literally a lifetime and it feels like it. An incredible amount has happened … Continue reading They should send in the jaded to teach Sex Ed.

The Thing About Being a Grown Up

Is that you often don’t realise you are one.

I Was Clearly Built For Comfort

I didn’t choose the cosy life, the cosy life chose me.

This Is My Life Now…

Accepting your fate.

Keeping Up

Keep up with who, exactly?

Coming Up For Air

And by ‘coming up for air’ I mean peeking my head out and dementedly gasping before plunging back down to resume the craziness that has become my normal.